'Overall, I just feel overwhelmed. At the same time, I am apathetic. I have this deep belief that every human situation is basically the same, regardless of outside circumstances. God loves all his creatures equally, or put in a less religious way, humans adapt and everyone is on the same hedonic treadmill. Everyone has good days and bad days. So it's all good. Nothing matters. I came to that conclusion when I was suicidal a while back, and it pulled me back into trying to stay alive. However, at the same time as holding that belief, I'm scared of giving in to it because what if I'm wrong? '
Surely if you don't believe, then there is no false hope!
Accept things as they are and just be.
Lets not kid ourselves!
We create our own societies and small worlds, so when faced with the larger ones out there, we feel dimished and scared by the buildings that tower over us.
Don't get lost in what you know
Be amazed by what there is to explore.