Tuesday, 18 January 2011

Find the right focus

'Is there something about the way we live now that’s making us extremely sad? Are these intensely negative feelings symptoms of a larger societal problem?'
Or perhaps we all just waste fucking time focusing that we are feeling down as opposed to focusing on ways to pull ourselves back up again...Everybody needs a hug, to tell them it is going to be ok. It's fine to need that and want that. But it does get to a point when you have to pull yourself together, without anyone telling you to also. I think you reach a point where you feel so crap you may want to hide away forever. But what life is that?

The ultimate low is reached, unless you want to self harm and abuse your own body (or even someone else in the process), how much lower can you really make yourself feel? After all, you are unhappy because something isn't going the right way in your life, right? It's better to accept the notion that you are sad as soon as you can, as soon as you are ready, because then the sooner you are able to turn everything around. If you never reached that low, then you may never have been in the position yourself to evaluate what isn't exactly right in your life. Perhaps everyday would be the usual, as apposed to the constant good day. The good day would be your exception. However reaching the low then turns everything around. The good day will always be the usual, and not the exception. You have reached that ultimate low-no day could be worse, so it's only going to get better.

At first, stubbornness kicks in. Who wants to admit that they are down? In some ways being down grabs the wrong attention. People start to pry, not necessarily because they want to meddle, i say pry in the sense that, they want to know whats going on with you. It's pretty much human instinct to want to help people-most would appreciate the same attention and compassion if they were feeling the same way. Yet that can be more painful itself because sometimes its nice to escape from how you really feel, to just have a few hours or seconds where life isn't about feeling depressed. Not again you may tell yourself...

I would say it needs structure. Talk, write, set goals. Because it isn't always that easy to keep yourself going everyday. Sometimes it helps to have that little reminder. You can't deny a method until you have tried it.

Imagine a ladder. It can only go upwards like the progress with yourself can only develop more. Most importantly, don't enjoy the depression either. Don't fall into the risk of chasing the right kind of attention you need. You will end up more lonely then before. Find it within yourself to pull through, by yourself, alone. The dependence on someone or something isn't necessary. It's better to not put too much pressure on any source you find either, just in case it isn't always accessible, say for example, running to clear your mind or finding the right person to speak to. If they aren't available it isn't a way of rejection, it's only a greater test for yourself to overcome a slight jolt in lets say, your recovery. Or more positively, your journey (which will be constant).

Just breathe, and imagine it all flooding out of you.

'the right kind of talk can fix our broken mind, helping us escape from the recursive loop of stress and negative emotion that’s making us depressed. Changing our thoughts is never easy and, in severe cases, might seem virtually impossible. We live busy lives and therapy requires hours of work and constant practice; our cortex can be so damn stubborn. But the data is clear: If we are seeking a long-lasting cure for depression, then it’s typically our most effective treatment.'
Cry if you want to. It is no weakness. It's showing you care and want to make a difference. Just remember, everyone is human. If there is that moment when you are walking down the street and feel the overwhelming urge to cry, yet are scared to be judged by others or stared at. Just remember that I bet they wish they had the confidence and lack of fear to be so free to express. After all, does it really matter, who is one to judge? Most of the time, people are closed off from you because they are trying to hide their own weaknesses as well.

Everyone is too afraid to smile...but that is a whole other story.

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