'Here is one way you can begin to make changes. Make a list of the things you are most unhappy about in your life. Here, why don't you do that now? Just make a list of the things in your life you are most unhappy about, and pick the one thing you would most like to change. I wonder what that would be. Would it be your job situation? Or perhaps your unstable finances? Your mortgage? The condition of your house? The unresolved questions with your partner?
Look at the things that are bothering you the most, and ask which ones you can change today, or this week. You may not like your job, but it takes time to change jobs. However, there may be certain aspects of your job that you can change, like your environment -- your regular chair, vehicle or work area -- as well as your commute, what you eat while at work, whom you eat with and the quality of your relationships with other people at work.
Your mortgage is another thing that would take time and effort to change. But you may be able to improve your house with paint or a new gardening project, so that while you are in it you are happier. Look for tangible changes that are relatively easy and inexpensive.
If your health is bad, you might take some simple steps to start improving it. You could exercise with an exercise group, or begin walking regularly, and try eating some new foods that make you feel a little better, and get a checkup to see if your nutrition is adequate and if any medications you are taking can be altered to make you feel better.
These are the kinds of changes I suggest you make. They are incremental changes that may not bring immediate rewards, but will slowly improve the quality of your life.
In making small changes, we also learn to pay attention to more subtle things, and this in itself can be an improvement.
These are things you can do.
For the time being, change what you can change, and let the rest be.'
http://www.salon.com/life/since_you_asked/2011/03/28/boyfriend_from_prison/index.html
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